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“Till death do us part.” This famous promise that almost every couple vows to uphold when entering into the institution of marriage unfortunately tends to be broken quite often. It is estimated that nearly 50% of modern marriages end in divorce (42% in the UK to be precise) and this has in turn created an ever-growing need for professionals who can assist people with navigating such a major life transition. Enter the divorce lawyer, who’s ‘bread and butter’ is quite literally to facilitate the termination of relationships so that once smitten lovers can move on with their newly separate lives.

One would think, given the nature of their work, that this kind of lawyer would be no stranger to divorce within their own life. After all, it has often been said that ‘experience is the best teacher’. However, the reality is quite the opposite. Divorce lawyers don’t tend to get divorced very often. In fact, they appear to steer away from the undertaking altogether at a greater rate than the average person does – but why is this so?

Although a long marriage doesn’t necessarily equate to a successful one, divorce lawyers tend to stay married for a variety of reasons. The first, and probably most obvious of these, is the simple fact that they regularly have to witness how difficult the process of getting a divorce actually is. Most people don’t realise how heavily a divorce can impact their lives, and this is largely because they have not been adequately prepared for the contract of marriage in the first place. When you buy a house, you are generally given copious amounts of paperwork to read through and digest before signing your name on the dotted line and making the final commitment. This is because you will need to have a good understanding of the practical, administrative, and financial capabilities required to own and manage a property, especially in today’s ever-changing economy. The same unfortunately cannot be said of getting married, as there really is no standardised pamphlet or handbook to guide young couples – a surprising truth considering the fact that marriage is quite possibly the most significant legal commitment one can make.

Divorce lawyers understand that the litigation involved in divorce is not only costly and time consuming, but it can also get incredibly ‘messy’ as one’s personal life is laid bare to scrutiny on a near-granular level. Details such as your earning and spending habits, who’s will you may be a beneficiary of, and how you intend to manage your pension or any property you own can all become ‘fair game’ in the aftermath of launching divorce proceedings. It is not unheard of for some couples to still be embroiled in legal disputes over child maintenance costs and property management nigh on a decade after their separation for example. Additionally, there is no evading the severe emotional and psychological consequences that a marriage breakdown can have on any children who are involved. Divorce lawyers will therefore understand that they are not the only party affected by making the potentially nuclear decision to separate from their partners, making them even more reticent to get divorced.

Should You Formalise Your Relationship?Perhaps all this awareness of the pitfalls of divorce also enables these professionals to choose more wisely when deciding on whom they should marry. They have been privy to not only the practical and financial aspects of their client’s lives, but also the personal and emotional elements, and have consequently witnessed a myriad of ways in which relationships can collapse. The strain of raising children, running a home, or not being properly understood or valued due to miscommunication can all lead to a marriage breakdown. As a result, ensuring that they are compatible with their future spouse by having aligned wants and needs for their relationship, realistic expectations of each other, and clearly designated roles and responsibilities (did someone say prenup?) will naturally be their first point of call.

Nonetheless, some divorce lawyers do end up getting divorced and this is simply because life circumstances do change, and adaptation is not always possible. At Grayfords, we understand the need to have to sometimes close the chapter of a marriage when things don’t work out and we pride ourselves in being able to support our clients on both a legal and personal level as we guide them through this process. If you are considering getting divorced and need expert legal advice and representation to fight for your best interest, don’t hesitate to call us today and book a free consultation to find out more about how we can help.

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